You'd better face the hard reality that situations that frustrate or prevent you from attaining your goals and from getting what you want from life really do exist. But must your feel angry? Have you no choice but to anger yourself at these everyday horrors?
Most psychologists agree that you absolutely must fell anger. They see the newborn infant as expressing emotions comparable and rage in the first hours of life. And throughout all ages or periods of development many humans confront almost daily their own feelings of healthy and those of other people with whom they come in contact. Most authorities in the field of psychology today say you need to protect yourself from the onslaughts of a hostile and aggressive world.
If you, say these authorities, do not always remain on your guard, you will stay especially vulnerable to others who will dominate and exploit you, jeopardize your freedom and property and take advantage of your passivity or so called good nature by abusing you for their own personal gain with no regard to your welfare. Psychologists with this point of view tell you that if you do not prepare to fight for what you want, you only have the alternative of remaining passive and silent when others take advantage of and prevent you from achieving your goals. Thus, most authorities today generally leave you with one of two alternative for dialing.
Squelching your anger doesn't get you much of anywhere and unexpressed rage will do you far more harm than candidly and freely expressed feelings. The hydraulic theory states other emotions have a tendency to increase in intensity, to expand under pressure like steam in a kettle, so that if you squelch your emotions, if you don't give free vent to them, you run the risk of doing some real harm to yourself. Real physical harm such as stomach ulcers, high blood pressure, or other sometimes more severe psychosomatic reactions.
In addition, refraining from giving honest expression to your feelings - keeping these feelings pent up inside you - doesn’t help you lose your anger. Quite the contrary. You will, in all probability, feel much worse. For your health hasn't gone away, but stays right there in your "gut". And now you can easily turn overly critical of yourself for not standing up for your rights with those who have caused the injustice.
Conversely, if you let yourself feel authentically angry and let others know about your feelings, you may frequently encounter problems of quite another nature. For people will receive your free expression in most instances as an outwardly aggressive or hostile action, and will probably close themselves off from you and defensively respond to you with further hostility.
Some therapists in the field have attempted to solve the problem with still another alternative, what they call creative aggression. This differs from the above free expression method in that your express yourself more controllably and hope (often against hope!) that others will willingly listen to your point of view.
Most psychologists agree that you absolutely must fell anger. They see the newborn infant as expressing emotions comparable and rage in the first hours of life. And throughout all ages or periods of development many humans confront almost daily their own feelings of healthy and those of other people with whom they come in contact. Most authorities in the field of psychology today say you need to protect yourself from the onslaughts of a hostile and aggressive world.
If you, say these authorities, do not always remain on your guard, you will stay especially vulnerable to others who will dominate and exploit you, jeopardize your freedom and property and take advantage of your passivity or so called good nature by abusing you for their own personal gain with no regard to your welfare. Psychologists with this point of view tell you that if you do not prepare to fight for what you want, you only have the alternative of remaining passive and silent when others take advantage of and prevent you from achieving your goals. Thus, most authorities today generally leave you with one of two alternative for dialing.
Squelching your anger doesn't get you much of anywhere and unexpressed rage will do you far more harm than candidly and freely expressed feelings. The hydraulic theory states other emotions have a tendency to increase in intensity, to expand under pressure like steam in a kettle, so that if you squelch your emotions, if you don't give free vent to them, you run the risk of doing some real harm to yourself. Real physical harm such as stomach ulcers, high blood pressure, or other sometimes more severe psychosomatic reactions.
In addition, refraining from giving honest expression to your feelings - keeping these feelings pent up inside you - doesn’t help you lose your anger. Quite the contrary. You will, in all probability, feel much worse. For your health hasn't gone away, but stays right there in your "gut". And now you can easily turn overly critical of yourself for not standing up for your rights with those who have caused the injustice.
Conversely, if you let yourself feel authentically angry and let others know about your feelings, you may frequently encounter problems of quite another nature. For people will receive your free expression in most instances as an outwardly aggressive or hostile action, and will probably close themselves off from you and defensively respond to you with further hostility.
Some therapists in the field have attempted to solve the problem with still another alternative, what they call creative aggression. This differs from the above free expression method in that your express yourself more controllably and hope (often against hope!) that others will willingly listen to your point of view.
